QUEENSTOWN, 19 May 2024
All good things have an ending, even adventures. So, why not make it go out in such a way as worth remembering forever?
Thanks to Nomad Safaris.
That’s precisely what we did!
As the sun started to rise over the now snow-covered mountains that surround Queenstown and Lake Wakatipu, we watched as our two safari 4x4s arrived, aptly rubber ARAGRN and SARUMN, and bid farewell to Julie. The part of Red Carpet was over, time for her to get back home and await the arrival of her imminent grandson (and Josh’s son). It’ll be a very happy day for the RC family soon.
Then off we sped (very surreal after so much coach driving), six of us in “Aragorn” – Jon, Liam. Emma, Joe, Bare-Foot Michael and I. The other 5 trailing behind.
We lucked out with the most experienced driver, Jenny, who cracked jokes at a stunning rate as only a semi crazy, speed demon, font of knowledge can.
We were making away around to just NW of Queenstown on the far end of the lake. On the way, finding so many locations. The first of which was so Jenny could point out across the lake the places we missed yesterday due to weather – Dimrill Dale, Amon Hen etc. (Miruvor and the Silverlode).
I also saw a phenomenon that stole my voice away. The sun rising from behind three peaks, casting their shadows across the clouds. It was mesmerising.
Then off we raced, past Glenorchy and into the wilds. We drove through beautiful “beech” (not actually beeches… colonial botanists were idiots) forests that were on private land. Here lies parts of Lothlorien and the clearing where Boromir dies. A bit further down we found ourselves looking a large patch of land surrounded by mountains, nothing recognisable… until you composite those mountains and hills and trees around the “bigature” of Orthanc, and suddenly, there stands Isengard (and Beorn’s House. Go figure!)
We were also told that round here is “film Mecca” as not only did LOTR film here, but also, Mission Impossible, Narnia and The Hobbit. Not to mention a few *NDA* projects recently!
After another few corners, we rose up into snow country! A sudden turn and BAM. Goodbye greenery. Hello snow. It was also the first of many times Jenny showed us her little quirks. The first was that just before each time the jeep careened down into deep water and splashed back out, she’d tinkle out, “splish, splash!“
Finally, at the end of the road, with it pulling around in a loop, we had an amazing morning tea/coffee where I was given non-dairy milk and specific snacks, which were SO tasty and donned cloaks and swords for some truly amazing photos.
I mean…
Back in the jeeps, we rocketed back the way we came for our last two locations for the first half of the tour. One being where the Ents ‘rrrrelease the riverrrrr!’
And the other being a little walk through some beautiful shrubs and to a very recognisable campsite… though sadly, no potatoes… nor Mûmakil (Oliphaunts).
It was shaping up to be an amazing day, albeit we hadn’t really done any *off-roading* worthy of a safari jeep.
Famous last words…
After grabbing an AMAZING (and… suspect) bagel at *-Balls and Bangles-* and being joined by McKenzie (who had only booked the afternoon stretch), we hipped back into ARAGRN with Jenny and pelted it back toward the Kawarau Bungy Bridge from a few days ago.
We stopped first on the outskirts of QT to view the hills (private tours allowed, but very overpriced, apparently) where the Rohan refugees travel to Helm’s Deep before arriving at the Chard Vineyard where we travelled a very narrow, sheer drop, dirt track (the original Queenstown road, Jenny told us) that brought us opposite the Kawarau bridge. Here we saw the river running uncannily (beautifully) blue below us and realised we were looking at the valley of The Argonath from The Fellowship of the Ring. That was very cool. It may not seem the same from the films at times. It was shot, expanded with CGI, and then the miniatures of the Argonath were overlaid. But they’re there, particularly when the Fellowship row past the feet.
All Kawarau Gorge.
So, back in the jeep, we raced backwards and just uphill to the West to Arrowtown. A preserved mining town, which had weird bathrooms. We stopped there just before walking to our location, and they’re automatic doors that lock with a 10-minute lock timer. No big deal. Odd, but not bad, there are some in the UK. What is odd is the American voice that says, “lock time is 10 minutes. ENJOY!” followed by weird ambient music that feels less public toilet and more like Danish Dystopian Horror. I wondered when Lars von Trier would yell cut and I could shower for a week.
Here, we saw the Gladden Fields (Isildur’s death where the Ring is lost for 2000 years), a location that’s only a fraction in the grand scheme of things, but beautiful all the same.
However, then Jenny came into her own. Slamming her door shut, turning to us and saying:
Right. To the Ford of Bruinen… which we can’t get to via roads.
Buckle up, everybody.
So, away went the road, and suddenly, we were shaking and being thrown up and down, hither and thither and all the while, water splashing everywhere.
NOW, we were on safari!
We went all the way to the end of the off-road circuit, turned around, and stopped for another set of coffee and biscuits. Divine.
Back in ARAGRN, we made our way to our final adventure. No more film locations. But, time for Skipper’s Canyon. The 10th most dangerous road in the world… a mountain chasm road with sheer drops and rarely able to be driven in winter without chains and serious skill.
We had both. So, up we went!
I want to be able to write down just how amazing (and terrifying) Skipper’s Canyon was, but it will take time. I’m planning on expanding each chapter once I’m home (my own Extended Editions!), but for now here are some videos and photos of what it was like 1000+ ft high and driving and twisting our way through it.
Don’t look down…
The canyon conquered, we made our way back to our hotel and got ready for our final dinner at Winnie’s pizza (an apparent favourite of Martin Freeman when he was filming The Hobbit). When I say this was one of the best vegan pizzas I’ve ever had, I’m not messing about. I’ve had many. I will, without a doubt, be back here again. The blasting out of Fleetwood, Elton, Budgie, The Beatles, and beyond was pretty stellar too. Angela also joined the 6 of us, which was nice!
I also paid for Jon’s dinner as a surprise, an act which rather than met with a ‘thank you’ or something similarly heartwarming, caused Jon to have what looked like a mix between a panic attack and cardiac arrest as he kept blustering “you didn’t need to do that”. It was very entertaining, if unexpected. Treat ya pals, people!
Afterwards, we set a time to meet for breakfast and went to grab a drink in the hotel bar on the table next to a larger bunch of the Fellowship all playing cards. It was a little subdued and sombre for various reasons, and in hindsight, I wish I’d joined the other table and had more time with them than with my own thoughts. But, here we are…
At the end of our tour.
Next comes the long journey home.
– Jake,
24 May 2024
P.S. Jon is also writing about his version of events over on his Tumblr page, Misplaced Midlanders! Check it out!
The Long Expected Journey 